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Life In The Fast Lane

Photos of kids..
 
Adolescence
Adolescence

It took forever to turn the BIG “18”, and lets not even talk about how long it felt waiting to graduate high school. There were even times when wishing of being an adult seemed like it would be more fun than being a teenager, maybe that was because when you are younger you think controlling your own life is so much easier. However, once you get there you realize that although it may have looked easy, it wasn’t. Not to mention, how fast time starts to pass. Oh, and guess what those days when you were younger and the words, “I can’t wait until I grow up, so I can do what I want to do,” becomes less than a reality because you understand no matter where life leads you, you will always have rules to follow.

If there was any advice that I could give to someone who was still living at home with their parents, or just a teenager wishing to be an adult……I would tell them to enjoy and take advantage of their life. Enjoy giving the responsibility to your parents that love you and wish only the best for you. Know that you are in good hands, and the only requirement of you is to get a good education, and have as much “clean fun” as possible. I am not saying that adulthood doesn’t have its perks, or is not exciting, but it is a huge responsibility. So stop and take your wonder years one day at a time because you are a teenager only once in a lifetime.  

I….AM…HAPPY!

Be Happy

I know I haven’t written in a while… and maybe it was because I started to realize what was important. I needed to take the time and show love to the people who was loving me. I was over exerting myself and not realizing that all the time I was putting towards other things, and certain people was not worth it. I was missing out on what counted in my life when it was right at my fingertips. The one thing that most people long, or dream to have. I am able to jungle things a little bit better now, and I am happy with the way things are flowing. I am happy with the circle that I have formed.  I am happy with the future that I am building. I am happy with the friendships and the bonds that I am finding within my family.  I am happy, I am happy……AND I’M BACK TO WRITING….and WOW….do I have a lot to say. LOL!

 

‘THIS ISN’T LOVE’

 

The Secrets of Love

I’ve never been this hurt, I’ve never experienced this much pain. To know that from you, the one I love, can cause grief and shame. I’ve heard the words I’m sorry, but never would I’ve imagine the thought of hearing it from you. You promise to love, and protect me now my heart is confused. I’ve taken the most I can of this frivolous relationship, and I’ve built a defense that can handle anything. I’ve made excuses for your behavior, but now what everyone else said, I see is true. You are the duplicate of selfishness. Maybe this have been our destiny, we should call it what it is. The end, the end of a tarnish broken heart that can’t handle another makeup to breakup session that always end with you saying “that’s how love is. People argue and work through things.” That is not how love is, “all the time”. Love is kind, bearable, forsaken, compassionate, outgoing, happily overwhelming, love is patience, love listens, love builds up, love doesn’t breakdown, love is encouraging, love doesn’t cause frowns, love is felt by action, love is not a word that isn’t proven by action, love is not physically or verbally abusive, love is sharing and long-suffering. I can go on, but I think you get it. I think you understand that the pain that no one knows you experience everyday is not what love is. But how long? How long will the frontier of your exterior put on a mask to pretend that what you have is love? When you know damn well, it is time to move on.

Circle of Trust

Friends

Every once and a while I take a look at the people that I surround myself with. This is to make sure that everyone in my life brings me joy, and NO negativity. So far, I have to say, I love the circle of people that I have in my life. Sometimes certain friendships go through things, the same way that a family go through hard times. However, the key to the entire mishap or misunderstanding is realizing what went wrong, and how to find your way back to loving and being their for each other.

People tell me why don’t you get out and make new friends, or meet different people. Well, maybe because I tried that, and I saw that making new friends sometimes meant getting hurt in the process. Besides, everyone you meet is not always friend material. There is no need for me to meet new people unless it is about business because the friends and family that I have are already“the cream of the crop” ,which means “the best”, and they believe in me and love me. I couldn’t ask for anything more.

 

 

Don’t Hold Back!

English: Bratislava; New Year 2005; FireWorks

WELCOME TO 2012!!!!

 

Last night a lot of people probably made a lot of New Year’s Resolutions, but how many will stick to it.

 

I’ve found that whatever you put your mind to, it is possible. However, most of us never accomplish any of our dreams because of the number one thing that holds us back. Guess what that is? Ourselves.

 

Our greatest challenge is overcoming our inner fears of what might happen if we step out on the edge and take a chance. Taking a chance is a part of life, we need to ignore our “What If” and go for it.

Most people, try to make up every excuse in the world of why they can not make their dreams come true… “I have kids”, “I’m too old”, “not enough money”,or “I don’t have the time”. However, you have everything you need to accomplish your dreams, and succeed at it. It doesn’t matter what it is, it can be anything like starting your own business, going back to college, writing a book, singing, modeling, or losing weight. It doesn’t matter.

There is no excuse of why you can’t do it, and there is no one to blame. The only one to blame for holding you back is yourself. So, if there is something that you really want to see happen for yourself in 2012, then let loose the restraints that you keep holding yourself down with. Work towards your dreams and goals fearlessly, and most of all believe in you. Why? Because if you don’t believe in yourself, why should anyone else.

Know what you want.

Recognize that fear is not an option.

Believe in you, knowing that anything is possible.

It doesn’t matter what the outcome will be, you still give more than 100%.

 

 

 

“DON’T HATE THE PLAYER”

Everyday we go through changes from the time that we are born to the present day. We learn how to love, what is to be sad, things we like and dislike, and what is to accept ourselves for who we are. It is like watching a seed be planted, watered, and grown into a beautiful well-kept flower.

Gardenia jasminoides

Well, there are those that will either have thistles or never blossom and turn into weeds, and there are those that will be like a sweet-smelling flower that is enjoyable to be around because of the beauty it provides for the atmosphere. In this scenario, the weeds are the people who never learn how to be themselves, or never was self-motivating when it came to personal accomplishments such as finishing college, getting married, buying a house, having kids, buying a car that they’ve always wanted, or being that person that everyone likes and looks up to. The sweet-smelling flower, is the person whether it was buying a new car, getting married, or writing a book they always have things that are going on in their life from self-motivation and wanting to succeed.

Which brings me to this point:

Some people are made to be unhappy and no matter what they do, or who they are around they just can’t be themselves. That is probably because they never learned who they are because they spend most of their time trying to pretend and be someone they are not. The only person they are hurting is themselves. Know why? Because this doesn’t give the people around them a fair chance to see who they really are, which could possibly be someone wonderful. And by that person not knowing themselves and being around people who “are” sure about who they are and happy with themselves and content this can form an issue of jealousy. Jealousy is never a pretty thing it can cause you to do a lot of silly things to people who care about you. It can cause that person to form this jealousy for no apparent reason just because the people around them are doing well, and they are “standing still”.

But you know what I like to say to those “weeds” that try to keep a “sweet-smelling flower” from blossoming:

DON’T HATE THE PLAYER, HATE THE GAME….AND TRY TO GET SOME GAME OF YOUR OWN!!!!!

I know that was mean, but it is the truth. You can’t go around being jealousy of others success. Get yourself some business and try to achieve some accomplishments of your own. Then you can be happy with yourself, and who you are. Or here is a good idea accept yourself for who you are, and “GET OVER IT”.

“Being Realistic”

There will always be things that you have done in your life that you possibly wish you never did, but you realize you can never take it back. BUT, you can make it better by “NEVER” doing it “AGAIN”.

It’s like biting into a fruit, or food of some sort that you don’t like. At least you can say you tried it once, but some things are just not for you. Maybe you don’t have to try it at all to know that it’s not for you.

The point I am trying to make is that some people are stuck in time, meaning they will always be a certain way and possibly never mature, or start to see that things are not meant to always stay the same. Others will be able to grow and become a better person from the things that they have gone through, or be able to tell a fascinating story of how they “lived and learned”.

That is what people are made to do change. Yes, change! You can’t be a club going party animal for the rest of your life, or a promiscuous person and not take on the responsiblity of your actions. Eventually, there will always be what I like to call “A Reality Check”.

 

 

Working hard!!

I’ve been working hard trying to finish two novels. Yes, two novels by the end of December. Not to mention, working extremely hard to finish up school. There are always days that I miss blogging. Blogging is like my freedom of speech. Silly, I know, but it is my way of venting and expressing how I feel. So, no matter how busy I get between now and January, I will still be interrupting your computer screen with my uncontrollable thoughts and emotions. I just want to thank all my readers and followers for taking out the time to read my post. I hope to one day have my novels read the same way.

English: Girl Reading a Wikpedia-Book from Ped...

The Knowlegdge of Knowing

My life is not over, but I still consider myself a work in progress. There are days when I wish what I know now, I knew a long time ago, it would have saved me so much time that I spent trying to mature towards certain situations in life. It would have kept me from possibly making certain moments in my life unaccountable, or maybe even finishing school already, instead of figuring out what I love or want to do in my life years later, (which I finally realized, and the accomplishment is almost complete, congrats to me).

I guess if I would have acquired all this knowledge and knew all the answers, which sometimes I still don’t know, then I would not have had the learning experience. Not just that, I would not have been able to learn how to make certain decisions in my life if the answers were already there, or gain the ability to mature.

Like everyone knows, you can never change what was, but you can make a difference for what is to come by using the knowledge that you have obtained from life’s challenges.

Eyes Wide Open

Gorgeous Model with beautiful eyes

I was walking to my car, when that smell of overly fumigated cologne filled the air. There he was with a gym bag walking to his car, but wait, not just a gym bag, he had suits, shoes, and there in the truck of his car was pillows, and the appearance of sheets. He stared at me while he walked to his car. The look was agony and frustration of hopelessness. I broke his stare by looking away to open the trunk of my car. I could still feel him watching, suddenly his footsteps stops. I quickly grab my bag, and tried to rush back into the house. The footsteps started back, but they were growing closer this time, they stopped behind me. I turned around to see him standing there, unclear of what he wanted. I knew this day would come, especially since he knew that me and his punching bag were good friends. I got impatient and a little angry, so I asked the first question, “How can I help you? Is there a problem that I can fix, or are you just enjoying the view?”

He stood there, and started to walk away, then he turned around. He open his mouth to only utter words of worthlessness, but those words left a ringing sound of joy in my ear and a flutter in my heart, “She wants a divorce, and there is nothing I can do about it. She asked me to leave. Can you talk some sense into her?”

I did talk some sense into her, and finally it paid off. I guess during Christmas time she wanted to hear the sleigh bells ring, and not her head ringing from being pounded by the man she thought loved her. I had to contain myself and try not to show my over excited emotions. I very sternly and with much attitude told him, “I have nothing to do with what ever you have going on. She must have a good reason to be kicking you out. I’m not getting involved, besides you both told me to stay out of it, what ever it  is. Now please continue with what you were doing because you are interrupting my day. Please, try not to step on the grass, use the sidewalk. It definitely wasn’t a pleasure talking to you!”

I was about to walk away, but that wasn’t enough. He grabbed my arm. I snatched away forcefully and said angrily, “Unless you want to be the turkey in the middle of my table for dinner, you will never touch or even breathe my way when you see me. I have nothing to say. You made your own bed, seems to me that you confused your punching bag at the gym with your wife’s face. It’s possible because….I confuse your ass with your face on a daily basis.”

As I walked towards the house I saw her standing smiling in the doorway. She wore the color of yellow and no longer black, which painted the perfect scenario of happiness. She seemed confident, and content. The bruises on her face had faded away, just like her patience with the constant beatings, she was recognizable again.She silently whispered, “Thank you.”

Now, depending on how long she’s going to keep the devil out of the house, she will have a lot to be Thankful for on Thanksgiving, …..starting with her life, and the fact that she is no longer sleeping with the enemy.

 ***This is a follow-up from a series of previous post…….APPROACHED SUDDENLY BY THOSE EYES, THOSE BEAUTIFUL EYES,  AND THROUGH HER EYES.